Recently I explored relationships from the standpoint of the individuals involved, which is astrologically termed synastry. Each of the two people in a relationship is viewed individually for their personal relating potential. Once each is individually described, a comparison between the two describes the more intimate details of their story. However, there is more than one way to look at relationships. At the moment any pairing occurs, a new dynamic is produced which is termed a relationship. Relationships occur on so many levels: parent and child, marriage, boss and worker, teacher and student, siblings, in-laws, law and criminal, doctor and patient, stalker and victim, clergy and parishioner, to name a few.
Regardless of how many people we meet and the circumstances under which we meet them, in a split second of time a unique relationship is formed, one that did not exist prior to that moment and will cease to exist if the two people involved choose not to pursue it. Some of these meetings are brief such as a waitress handing you a cup of coffee. Some last a lifetime such as family members or marriage partners.
The bond that occurs between a mother and a child at the moment of birth is unique. After many years of refusing to allow the father to be present at the birth, the medical establishment currently encourages the father’s participation. The split-second bonding that the mother has always experienced is now available to the father. Yes! Nothing can equal that incredible moment and nothing can capture it once it has passed without the father’s participation. The mother really does not have a choice at childbirth; her participation is mandatory. Many years ago I took a workshop by Joseph Chilton Pearce in which this birth moment bonding process was explored. I immediately went home and told my son and his pregnant wife to be sure they were both part of the birthing process if it was at all possible. Many grandkids later, my whole family encourages this experience because of the bonding that occurs at the instant of birth.
Suppose I have ten friends. Each pairing provides a unique friendship. This takes nothing away from my other nine friends and enlarges each of our lives because of those friendships. I am bettered and my friend is bettered by our friendship. If I am a better person because of that friendship, I will be a better person to all my other friends, family, co-workers, etc. Whatever adds to my personal dimension in a positive fashion affects everything I do and everyone I touch with my more positive self. Conversely, if I am in a relationship that is negative, that negativity also affects all other relationships in which I participate if I am in any way diminished or compromised in the experience of that one relationship. I have been lessened therefore I am less than what I could be with all whom I come in contact.
To me there seem to be parts or stages …