I am a landlord. I have the gray hair to prove it. If that is not enough to prove it, I have some of the most amazing, head-shaking, wtf stories to back it up. Here are some of the more imaginative experiences that I have had as a landlord.
Tenant worked as a janitor at a church while he was waiting for his singing career as a christian musician to take off. He claimed he had tithed all of his rent money that month because he felt the church would do better good with the money. He never could explain why he tithed more than then 10% of my income to the church and didn’t donate the balance of the 90% of his income to cover his rent. So I evicted him. On eviction day, the sheriff had the eviction company through everything in the corner of the parking lot instead of on the street. My maintenance man was there to change the locks on the front door. After Work I was to meet my business partner at the property so we would drag all the items from parking lot to street. This included multiple bed frames, complete mattress sets, all of his and his 2 children’s clothing, washer & dryer, and everything else.
When I arrived at property two hours after the eviction I realized that everything was gone from the parking lot. I figured the tenant had come by with a truck to collect all of his belongings. I went inside the property to check the condition of the interior. Much to my surprise I discover the tenant had broken in the back door and had moved all of his belongings back inside the property. I call the police. He calls his church.
Next thing we have is multiple police cars and the minister and about 25 people from the church. The church people decide to join hands and ring the property and start singing christian songs. Of course my evicted tenant is standing in the middle singing the loudest solo I have ever heard. When not singing they are praying for the redemption of my soul since I refuse to evict his belongings from the property a second time in a three hour time period.
I am telling the police to have the tenant arrested from criminal trespassing. His possessions are now my possessions and I have no intention of giving any of it back. The police handcuff the tenant and place him in the back of the squad car. The minister steps up and decides to broker a deal. With the police watching the proceedings, my business partner and I start to lug some of the possessions out of the property and place them in the parking lot. The members of the church then start bidding on buying the items. Once we got close to the amount I was owed on back rent, I decided to sell everything else for $1. The church members just happened …